“Milk”

Tuesday night I went with my friend Michal to see the movie “Milk”. I must be the last of my friends to see it. I had held off because another friend had me promise not to see it without him. I keep my promises but after a month without any effort on his part it became obvious that he had forgotten the promise entirely. So I went with Michal.

I was happy to see the film with him. Definitely he’s one of my favourite friends. The sun is always out whenever he’s around and it seems to last a couple days after he’s gone. He lives in Kelowna and comes down a few times a year. Sometimes he stays with me but not the last few times as he has been attending seminars with work colleagues. We have often mused about doing road trips around the province to areas we have never seen, such as the 8 hr road from Williams Lake to Bella Coola through Tweedsmuir Provincial Park. I am always concerned that with my limited ability to deal with stairs and uneven terrain that I would be an impediment to travel with but he doesn’t see it that way. (Gawd bless his sweet soul!) Over dinner at an Italian restaurant before the movie he re-stated his commitment to do something with me this summer.

“Milk” has had a big impact with many of my gay friends, especially of my generation. I came out when Harvey Milk was still alive and visited San Francisco while he was still Supervisor. I was also in teacher training when he successfully fought Senator Briggs’ initiative to create a witch hunt against gay teachers. I thought the portrayal of those early years of gay liberation was brilliant. It really brought me back, though I was a bit young to be involved in activism in the late 70s as I was still trying to figure out who I was. My activism didn’t really start until February 1981 after the infamous Toronto bath raids.

Most of that pre-AIDS reality of the 70s has been lost but, unlike some friends, seeing these images again does not make me nostalgic. I never believed I was accepted by gay circles in those days, even though I felt a sense of loyalty to "the community". At least gay society was safer than straight society in most ways. I also see no point to nostalgia, just as I no longer fantasize about what I did before muscular dystrophy pinned me down. Some things it’s just not wise to think about too long.

PHOTO: Michal