Overtime

This is my 15th working day in a row (not counting weekends) that I have worked an extra hour and a half. I take the bus home, justifying my laziness with my extra income. Besides, the sidewalks on my normal route home are so torn up by the subway construction on Granville (which may never be finished in my lifetime) making it largely unsafe for me to navigate them in rush hour traffic while panicky commuters charge towards the trains at 4:30. The bus comes right to the back door of my office building every 5 minutes or so, making public transit a tempting choice.

When I get home I am still quite alert and quickly pay bills, do dishes, shopping or other chores while I have the energy. Then, like tonight, I settle in to work on stained glass for an hour or two.

What I hate being is idle. Idleness allows me to think about things I shouldn't think about, stirring up negativity which crops up too often in my life these days. So I was thinking between calls this afternoon what I should be doing to keep negativity out of my life. I had already thought of many things I shouldn't do, such as dwelling on negative thoughts, etc. I decided that to absorb my time I should focus on a combination of stained glass, writing and reading. Granted these are all solitary but I feel like I should withdraw into my own independent world where I won't be waiting for or depending on friends.