It's a true Vancouver day, complete with all the water sounds of a typical rain forest day: the slooshing and sloshing, the hiss and drip that sends chills down one's back if you let it. It's definitely the type of day brings out the isolation and loneliness. I have to get outside where the light is brighter, where the cool wet air is more inviting than it sounds.
I shuffled up the sidewalk to Shoppers Drug Mart to buy stamps and birthday cards for my brother and sister. "Water is Life" is the mantra I repeat over and over. It's not raining that hard, not enough to get me wet. I didn't even bother with an umbrella; just a cap and a waterproof rain shell. It's mild too, almost soothing, but I am restless.
Back home I try to keep busy, keep distracted. I don't want the loneliness to crystallize into depression. I invited Dennis to dinner last night but he didn't bother to respond, before or after. I wrote to Robert Golling to give him an update three days ago. He's the German couch surfer who Yves will host during the Olympics, which start in only 13 days. He hasn't responded. Rich and Luis were over last night for dinner and two games of Settlers of Catan. I'm not sure why I feel so lonely.
There is a lot of work to do at home today. I want to finish the second tulip window for Germen, do laundry and vacuum the place. I also want to see a couple plays in the coming week but I don't want to go alone. Not sure if I will if I can't find someone. The plays I want to see include "Beyond Eden" by Robert LePage, a play about William Duff and Bill Reid's trip to Haida Gwaii in the 50s to bring back totem poles to UBC, and Joni Mitchell dance theatre at the QE Theatre. There is also "Nevermore", the Edgar Allen Poe bio playing at the Granville Island Stage.
As long as I don't sit still I should be fine.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Spirit of the Olympics
January draws to a close and the war drums of the international 2010 Winter Olympics draw closer. Already the downtown office buildings and street corners are sprouting new banners and posters egging passersby to cheer for the Canadian team. Winning is the only objective and the media and local sporting officials claim Canada could walk away with the highest medal count. Isn't that what being a good host is all about?
VANOC, the blood-thirsty, greed-based vampire of an organization that oversees the Olympics is crowing the success of its on-line ticket scalping site, that has spread its money-grubbing lust to the masses. The cheapest tickets of a single event now go for $600 and the top end price for a ticket for the opening ceremonies would suffice for a down payment on a small condo. Nine family members of one of the American bob sledding team, which is expected to win gold, just learned that the house they rented in Whistler for $8000 to watch the event was actually a scam. For them the Games are ruined but the scammer is definitely feeling the true spirit of the games.
An invading army of several thousands of soldiers, police and security guards, more than the number of troops we have employed in Afghanistan, will comprise about 10% of the population around the sports and tourist venues. They are there to ensure that no terrorists, like the anti-Olympic movement that has waged a futile fight against the squandering of so many hundreds of millions of tax payers dollars, don't disrupt the "festivities". The cost for the policing will be approximately one billion dollars.
The events with their sky-high prices are not for local Vancouverites. About half the tickets are for media and corporate sponsors and rest are for the rich (they are the same). We won't likely be able to welcome either the tourists or athletes as there will be enough barriers between them and us. When it is all over, there will be a four lane highway from Vancouver to Whistler, a subway to the airport and a few over-sized and under-used sports facilities left behind and, of course, a massive debt that will take at least a quarter of a century to pay off, thereby preventing other improvements that would make this a more liveable city.
I tried not to be a cynic this time, tried not to see or smell the sewage treatment plant-sized ball of shit flying out of the sky and rolling over us. I wanted to welcome the world and keep my happy face. Undoubtedly, there will be lots of real human drama, both joy and sorrow and a coming together of the worlds best young athletes that would leave any porn producer weeping with envy. But the most wondrous and spiritual sites also attract and counteractive and equal degree of neutralizing cess and sleaze, like the sea of tourists, scam artists, thieves and hustlers who hang around sites like the pyramids and the Taj Mahal, the tacky, cheesy wax museums, freak shows and heart-shaped vibrating beds at Niagara Falls, or the sea of yuppie tourist boutiques that have sprung up in Woodstock, New York.
An acquaintance of mine who is a Native/gay/Catholic activist in New York, was pleased to learn that the mascots chosen for these Games would be three characters from Native West Coast mythology: "Quatchi", "Miga" and "Sumi", that is until I sent him the pathetic cartoon images they would be portrayed as. Their simplified names and bleached and boiled personalities bear no resemblance to the myths they are supposed to represent..jpg)
Quatchi (short for Sasquatch) "comes from the mysterious forests of Canada and dreams of being a hockey goalie", according the official Olympic website. The forests are certainly mysterious to the promoters who have never been there, and Quatchi has the personality of an unsalted soda biscuit. He looks like Chewbaka with a happy face. He is nothing like the shy, lumbering Bigfoot, terror of the forests who kidnapped young children and took them back to his cave to bugger them--a Catholic priest of sorts.
.jpg)
Miga, from Kwakiutl mythology, is a sea bear; half orca and half Kermode bear. Far from the sea Spirit who devours unwanted visitors, he (it) looks more like a skunk without a tail, with a white-faced, balloon-sized black head, white panda ears and a small French moustache. There's nothing about him that looks like either a bear or a killer whale. .jpg)
Sumi, a powerful animal Spirit with the legs of a black bear and wings of a Thunderbird, assumes the look of a gardener in a green smock wearing "a hat of an orca". Even in Native mythology whales don't wear hats, but even Disney would not design something this stupid. The hat looks like an overturned green salad bowl with points on top, and his green Thunderbird wings look like a watermelon slice with the colours reversed. He shares the same benign, mindless smile as the other two, proof of his mushroom-like personality and his inability to express or form thought.
They represent the consumers that do as the organizers would have them do. In that way, they are true mascots of these Games.
VANOC, the blood-thirsty, greed-based vampire of an organization that oversees the Olympics is crowing the success of its on-line ticket scalping site, that has spread its money-grubbing lust to the masses. The cheapest tickets of a single event now go for $600 and the top end price for a ticket for the opening ceremonies would suffice for a down payment on a small condo. Nine family members of one of the American bob sledding team, which is expected to win gold, just learned that the house they rented in Whistler for $8000 to watch the event was actually a scam. For them the Games are ruined but the scammer is definitely feeling the true spirit of the games.
An invading army of several thousands of soldiers, police and security guards, more than the number of troops we have employed in Afghanistan, will comprise about 10% of the population around the sports and tourist venues. They are there to ensure that no terrorists, like the anti-Olympic movement that has waged a futile fight against the squandering of so many hundreds of millions of tax payers dollars, don't disrupt the "festivities". The cost for the policing will be approximately one billion dollars.
The events with their sky-high prices are not for local Vancouverites. About half the tickets are for media and corporate sponsors and rest are for the rich (they are the same). We won't likely be able to welcome either the tourists or athletes as there will be enough barriers between them and us. When it is all over, there will be a four lane highway from Vancouver to Whistler, a subway to the airport and a few over-sized and under-used sports facilities left behind and, of course, a massive debt that will take at least a quarter of a century to pay off, thereby preventing other improvements that would make this a more liveable city.
I tried not to be a cynic this time, tried not to see or smell the sewage treatment plant-sized ball of shit flying out of the sky and rolling over us. I wanted to welcome the world and keep my happy face. Undoubtedly, there will be lots of real human drama, both joy and sorrow and a coming together of the worlds best young athletes that would leave any porn producer weeping with envy. But the most wondrous and spiritual sites also attract and counteractive and equal degree of neutralizing cess and sleaze, like the sea of tourists, scam artists, thieves and hustlers who hang around sites like the pyramids and the Taj Mahal, the tacky, cheesy wax museums, freak shows and heart-shaped vibrating beds at Niagara Falls, or the sea of yuppie tourist boutiques that have sprung up in Woodstock, New York.
An acquaintance of mine who is a Native/gay/Catholic activist in New York, was pleased to learn that the mascots chosen for these Games would be three characters from Native West Coast mythology: "Quatchi", "Miga" and "Sumi", that is until I sent him the pathetic cartoon images they would be portrayed as. Their simplified names and bleached and boiled personalities bear no resemblance to the myths they are supposed to represent.
.jpg)
Quatchi (short for Sasquatch) "comes from the mysterious forests of Canada and dreams of being a hockey goalie", according the official Olympic website. The forests are certainly mysterious to the promoters who have never been there, and Quatchi has the personality of an unsalted soda biscuit. He looks like Chewbaka with a happy face. He is nothing like the shy, lumbering Bigfoot, terror of the forests who kidnapped young children and took them back to his cave to bugger them--a Catholic priest of sorts.
.jpg)
Miga, from Kwakiutl mythology, is a sea bear; half orca and half Kermode bear. Far from the sea Spirit who devours unwanted visitors, he (it) looks more like a skunk without a tail, with a white-faced, balloon-sized black head, white panda ears and a small French moustache. There's nothing about him that looks like either a bear or a killer whale. .jpg)
Sumi, a powerful animal Spirit with the legs of a black bear and wings of a Thunderbird, assumes the look of a gardener in a green smock wearing "a hat of an orca". Even in Native mythology whales don't wear hats, but even Disney would not design something this stupid. The hat looks like an overturned green salad bowl with points on top, and his green Thunderbird wings look like a watermelon slice with the colours reversed. He shares the same benign, mindless smile as the other two, proof of his mushroom-like personality and his inability to express or form thought.
They represent the consumers that do as the organizers would have them do. In that way, they are true mascots of these Games.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Winter
Dear T---,
Although I have never had a long term relationship like yours, and not a short-term one in more than a decade either, I do know what it must feel like to go through the misery you are tormented by. I do know the loss and the immense loneliness that comes with it.
As I see it, you are sensing the obvious, that the relationship you have known and have invested so much in is gone forever. It cannot be repaired and returned to the way it once was. It has evolved and you are not prepared to evolve with it, not if that means loss of intimacy and B--- not nurturing you. But you have lost that side of the relationship already and B--- does not have the strength or faith to love even himself. He seems very frightened to lose you because he believes he does not have the strength to make it on his own. He is probably saddened that he cannot love you back as he once could.
Like B---, I too am on that slippery slope towards Death. Even an improvement in my strength will be temporary as the aging process takes over. If I do stage a recovery it might last for a few years, but it will be no more than a reprieve. Only Death is certain. My mortality terrifies me.
My circumstances with my muscular dystrophy seem cruel and severe to most of my friends, and to me too, but in one way life has been extremely kind to me: it has given me two decades to get used to the idea of Death, and may even give me two or three more.
When I was a young teenager, perhaps about 13 or so, I wondered a lot about how I would die. Most people said they hoped to die quickly but I knew even then that I would need a lot of time to grow accustomed to the idea. I knew too that contemplation of Death is one of the greatest opportunities in life to grow spiritually. Life has answered my prayers and given me this wonderful (but painful) opportunity to maximize my spiritual growth and I do not intend to waste it.
B--- is extremely lucky to have you to support him as the transition approaches. You will be there for him in the time of his greatest need. You are not like my partner who fled to the hills as soon as he heard of my diagnosis of muscular dystrophy, but perhaps that is because I am stronger than B--- and can manage the voyage on my own. I have often felt like a scared child, wishing and begging for someone to comfort me as the waters grown rougher, but even in this state I know that no one else can do much to help me. I must find my own courage and learn on my own to trust the process. There is simply no other option.
In return for your support, B--- will teach you how to die, what it means to decay and lose all that you have loved about life. This may be the only way he can "be there" for you when you start to die, by showing you the way, even if he cannot do it with dignity in the end. To care for him and give him support will strengthen you for when your time comes.
This is not about whether or not he enjoys the leather scene or him not caring about you enough. You need to let go of feeling rejected and deserted and take care of your own physical and emotional needs elsewhere. You will need your strength as his health grows worse. As the English say, you have not seen the forest for all the trees in the way. It is a bigger situation than how you have described it. It will help you greatly to see the bigger picture.
I am not sure if you were asking my advice and, if so, if you are prepared to hear what I am saying, but it will be a mistake to leave him now. You would never forgive yourself. But please take my advice and look for nurturing elsewhere while you nurture him. For your own good as well as his.
all my love, Ken
Although I have never had a long term relationship like yours, and not a short-term one in more than a decade either, I do know what it must feel like to go through the misery you are tormented by. I do know the loss and the immense loneliness that comes with it.
As I see it, you are sensing the obvious, that the relationship you have known and have invested so much in is gone forever. It cannot be repaired and returned to the way it once was. It has evolved and you are not prepared to evolve with it, not if that means loss of intimacy and B--- not nurturing you. But you have lost that side of the relationship already and B--- does not have the strength or faith to love even himself. He seems very frightened to lose you because he believes he does not have the strength to make it on his own. He is probably saddened that he cannot love you back as he once could.
Like B---, I too am on that slippery slope towards Death. Even an improvement in my strength will be temporary as the aging process takes over. If I do stage a recovery it might last for a few years, but it will be no more than a reprieve. Only Death is certain. My mortality terrifies me.
My circumstances with my muscular dystrophy seem cruel and severe to most of my friends, and to me too, but in one way life has been extremely kind to me: it has given me two decades to get used to the idea of Death, and may even give me two or three more.
When I was a young teenager, perhaps about 13 or so, I wondered a lot about how I would die. Most people said they hoped to die quickly but I knew even then that I would need a lot of time to grow accustomed to the idea. I knew too that contemplation of Death is one of the greatest opportunities in life to grow spiritually. Life has answered my prayers and given me this wonderful (but painful) opportunity to maximize my spiritual growth and I do not intend to waste it.
B--- is extremely lucky to have you to support him as the transition approaches. You will be there for him in the time of his greatest need. You are not like my partner who fled to the hills as soon as he heard of my diagnosis of muscular dystrophy, but perhaps that is because I am stronger than B--- and can manage the voyage on my own. I have often felt like a scared child, wishing and begging for someone to comfort me as the waters grown rougher, but even in this state I know that no one else can do much to help me. I must find my own courage and learn on my own to trust the process. There is simply no other option.
In return for your support, B--- will teach you how to die, what it means to decay and lose all that you have loved about life. This may be the only way he can "be there" for you when you start to die, by showing you the way, even if he cannot do it with dignity in the end. To care for him and give him support will strengthen you for when your time comes.
This is not about whether or not he enjoys the leather scene or him not caring about you enough. You need to let go of feeling rejected and deserted and take care of your own physical and emotional needs elsewhere. You will need your strength as his health grows worse. As the English say, you have not seen the forest for all the trees in the way. It is a bigger situation than how you have described it. It will help you greatly to see the bigger picture.
I am not sure if you were asking my advice and, if so, if you are prepared to hear what I am saying, but it will be a mistake to leave him now. You would never forgive yourself. But please take my advice and look for nurturing elsewhere while you nurture him. For your own good as well as his.
all my love, Ken
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Kicking the coffee habit
I love coffee, especially the kick it gives me in the morning, but after hearing from my naturopath that higher than normal acidity in my body is part of the cause of my dystrophy and general weakness, I decided on my own to make the change. The first day is always the worst.
So far so good, but I was dragging my ass all day. I didn't get nearly as much done on my window as I hoped I would. I have been nursing a mild headache and befuddled thinking on the second half of the day too. But I am doing it! :o)
There was a protest today against Harper for proroguing Parliament to avoid criticism. I probably would not have attended even if I was feeling better, as I find it hard to stand for an hour in a crowd. It was chilly too, but given that we expect to make it right through January without so much as a frost this year I will not complain.
So far so good, but I was dragging my ass all day. I didn't get nearly as much done on my window as I hoped I would. I have been nursing a mild headache and befuddled thinking on the second half of the day too. But I am doing it! :o)
There was a protest today against Harper for proroguing Parliament to avoid criticism. I probably would not have attended even if I was feeling better, as I find it hard to stand for an hour in a crowd. It was chilly too, but given that we expect to make it right through January without so much as a frost this year I will not complain.
Fallin' Down
I've had a couple of falls in the past 10 days, one on the 13th when I was getting off a bus to get to work, the other in my pod at work just returning from getting a drink of water. They ended a period of just over 5 months without a fall.
The first fall happened when an impatient woman crowding up to the door wasn't giving me space to hold the bus's door frame as I was stepping down. I decided I could step around her without holding onto anything. Think positively, I said to myself, just before I lost my balance. I grabbed at a light standard as I fell, which softened the fall. I wasn't bruised or hurt in any way.
The second fall was two days ago after a night of fasting. My new naturopath, Larry Chan, asked that I fast for a saliva test, which meant no supplements for 24 hours, no food or water, including diabetes medicines (I use pills). I was so nervous about getting there and surviving the fast safely that I barely slept all night. The exhaustion probably played a bigger role than the fasting.
I made it to my appointment for testing, waited to see the naturopath after that, and got back to my workplace so I could take my medicines and get some food before I started work. But that wasn't good enough. I fell about an hour later, scuffing my foot on the carpet, which caused the fall as I have no knee muscles left. I fell hard on both knees, scraping and bruising them both, but not too seriously. They are mostly recovered already.
I slept about 12 hours yesterday and had another good sleep last night so I am caught up on sleep. The falls have lowered my fall average over the past 10 falls to 88 days from almost 99. The next couple falls will likely lower it much more as my two longest periods without a fall will no longer be part of my average.
I am disheartened but not as depressed about it as I would have been a couple years ago. Dr Chan has given me some hope for the future too, as he is fairly certain that a combination of testosterone and growth hormone treatments will have a noticeable impact on my strength. First, I need to meet with Dr Taylor, my GP, to have my hormone levels tested (Tuesday). I also need to take a kidney cleanse for two weeks and de-acidify and rehydrate my body, which I begin to do today. I am using chlorophyll in water three times per day and cutting out coffee from now on. The latter will be a challenge for the next few days.
The first fall happened when an impatient woman crowding up to the door wasn't giving me space to hold the bus's door frame as I was stepping down. I decided I could step around her without holding onto anything. Think positively, I said to myself, just before I lost my balance. I grabbed at a light standard as I fell, which softened the fall. I wasn't bruised or hurt in any way.
The second fall was two days ago after a night of fasting. My new naturopath, Larry Chan, asked that I fast for a saliva test, which meant no supplements for 24 hours, no food or water, including diabetes medicines (I use pills). I was so nervous about getting there and surviving the fast safely that I barely slept all night. The exhaustion probably played a bigger role than the fasting.
I made it to my appointment for testing, waited to see the naturopath after that, and got back to my workplace so I could take my medicines and get some food before I started work. But that wasn't good enough. I fell about an hour later, scuffing my foot on the carpet, which caused the fall as I have no knee muscles left. I fell hard on both knees, scraping and bruising them both, but not too seriously. They are mostly recovered already.
I slept about 12 hours yesterday and had another good sleep last night so I am caught up on sleep. The falls have lowered my fall average over the past 10 falls to 88 days from almost 99. The next couple falls will likely lower it much more as my two longest periods without a fall will no longer be part of my average.
I am disheartened but not as depressed about it as I would have been a couple years ago. Dr Chan has given me some hope for the future too, as he is fairly certain that a combination of testosterone and growth hormone treatments will have a noticeable impact on my strength. First, I need to meet with Dr Taylor, my GP, to have my hormone levels tested (Tuesday). I also need to take a kidney cleanse for two weeks and de-acidify and rehydrate my body, which I begin to do today. I am using chlorophyll in water three times per day and cutting out coffee from now on. The latter will be a challenge for the next few days.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Proroguing Parliament
Our evil federal government, led by Prime Minister Stephen Harper (the Conservative least likely to drag his knuckles, according to the Ottawa Citizen) has developed a nasty habit of proroguing Parliament, that is, recessing Parliament at the time it should normally be sitting. He did it last year to avoid being toppled by the three opposition parties whose funding he was trying to cut. It caused quite a stir when he did it then, just a few weeks after a national election. No one wanted the government to fall that quickly and be forced into another election that would change nothing.
This year Harper has prorogued it until March to avoid criticism about prisoners in Afghanistan being tortured while in Canadian care or being handed over to other authorities, such as the Americans or Karzai's puppet government, who they know will be torturing them. He claimed he needed time to consult business and citizens about the next phase of his economic recovery plan, as though he is incapable of consulting Canadians while Parliament is functioning.
It is quite apparent that Harper is misusing the right to prorogue Parliament, which was meant only for emergencies and for the national good, not just to avoid opposition questioning and to cling to power. His side-kick and Security Minister Stockwell Day, when serving in the Alberta government a decade ago, complained that the government should be allowed to suspend Parliament for half a year so his government could get more done. It seems Harper shares the belief that democracy is not the point of governing, but an encumbrance to be dodged whenever possible.
Our Governor General, Michaelle Jean, allowed both proroguings to occur. Last year I could see her reasoning, so soon after an election, but this year it was so obviously a misuse. I was feeling frustrated about this until I saw the results of a recent opinion poll. The support for the Conservative government has fallen dramatically. A month ago they had a 15 percentage point lead over the Liberals and now it is less than 2%. Hopefully the trend will continue.
This year Harper has prorogued it until March to avoid criticism about prisoners in Afghanistan being tortured while in Canadian care or being handed over to other authorities, such as the Americans or Karzai's puppet government, who they know will be torturing them. He claimed he needed time to consult business and citizens about the next phase of his economic recovery plan, as though he is incapable of consulting Canadians while Parliament is functioning.
It is quite apparent that Harper is misusing the right to prorogue Parliament, which was meant only for emergencies and for the national good, not just to avoid opposition questioning and to cling to power. His side-kick and Security Minister Stockwell Day, when serving in the Alberta government a decade ago, complained that the government should be allowed to suspend Parliament for half a year so his government could get more done. It seems Harper shares the belief that democracy is not the point of governing, but an encumbrance to be dodged whenever possible.
Our Governor General, Michaelle Jean, allowed both proroguings to occur. Last year I could see her reasoning, so soon after an election, but this year it was so obviously a misuse. I was feeling frustrated about this until I saw the results of a recent opinion poll. The support for the Conservative government has fallen dramatically. A month ago they had a 15 percentage point lead over the Liberals and now it is less than 2%. Hopefully the trend will continue.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
What is it that I can do for you?
He is not a close friend, just a younger guy I had met a few times before. In October we spent a weekend with other friends out of town. We cuddled for a few hours over those two days, nothing sexual or romantic, just gentle, respectful nurturing, but it was a real treat for me as I wasn't used to it.
When we returned to the city we made little effort to stay in touch. We had no expectations. I called him twice over, once right after the weekend and once a month later just to check in with him. He had started seeing someone and was excited about that. He told me he wanted to remain friends, that he would build a ramp at his front door to make it easier for me to climb the steps that had no railings. I said that seemed like too much trouble but he said it was important that he could welcome me into his home.
In December he called me after seeing a stained glass exhibit somewhere. He was excited by the art he saw and wanted me to teach him, but it was Christmas and I was quite busy. I put off returning his call. Before I knew it the new year had arrived. I felt a bit guilty about not calling earlier.
I called him on a Sunday evening after spending the afternoon working on window I am making. There was a fair bit ambient noise when he picked up. I asked if I had caught him at a bad time. He said no, that he was relaxing in a coffee shop. We talked for a minute, mostly me asking him how his life was going and him answering. Then he suddenly says, "I am wondering what it is that I can do for you?" with a touch of impatience in his voice.
I was caught off guard. "Uh, nothing really" I replied, then I reminded him of his call asking about stained glass lessons. His voice took on an apologetic tone and he even sounded interested for a few seconds, but then came the excuses as to why it would not be a good time to have lessons for the next couple months. Whenever, I replied.
But his words remained in my head: "What is it I can do for you?" like a business call, but not. He was really saying Let me get this call over with so I can get on with my life. He was telling me I am not his friend, that he doesn't enjoy talking to me.
"What is it that I can do for you?" Nothing.....REALLY!
When we returned to the city we made little effort to stay in touch. We had no expectations. I called him twice over, once right after the weekend and once a month later just to check in with him. He had started seeing someone and was excited about that. He told me he wanted to remain friends, that he would build a ramp at his front door to make it easier for me to climb the steps that had no railings. I said that seemed like too much trouble but he said it was important that he could welcome me into his home.
In December he called me after seeing a stained glass exhibit somewhere. He was excited by the art he saw and wanted me to teach him, but it was Christmas and I was quite busy. I put off returning his call. Before I knew it the new year had arrived. I felt a bit guilty about not calling earlier.
I called him on a Sunday evening after spending the afternoon working on window I am making. There was a fair bit ambient noise when he picked up. I asked if I had caught him at a bad time. He said no, that he was relaxing in a coffee shop. We talked for a minute, mostly me asking him how his life was going and him answering. Then he suddenly says, "I am wondering what it is that I can do for you?" with a touch of impatience in his voice.
I was caught off guard. "Uh, nothing really" I replied, then I reminded him of his call asking about stained glass lessons. His voice took on an apologetic tone and he even sounded interested for a few seconds, but then came the excuses as to why it would not be a good time to have lessons for the next couple months. Whenever, I replied.
But his words remained in my head: "What is it I can do for you?" like a business call, but not. He was really saying Let me get this call over with so I can get on with my life. He was telling me I am not his friend, that he doesn't enjoy talking to me.
"What is it that I can do for you?" Nothing.....REALLY!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
